A letter of longing for Daddy and the patient desire for a relationship with him.
A letter of longing for Daddy and the patient desire for a relationship with him.
Being a father is difficult, being a distant dad can be even harder. Luckily, there are great resources to guide our efforts and inform our parenting decisions. One source is TED.com. Here are the top 6 talks for Distant Dads...
Can we first agree that we all wish we had MORE…more love from our daughters, more time to spend with them, more money to help, more of just a normal life? But the truth is this game of self-punishment and wishing is about as self-sabotaging as any you may play. You can never have enough of these things and you know this in your heart...
We are collecting letters of advice from women that grew up without an active and involved father in their life. These letters are to dads that are good men who are concerned they may be losing the connection with their daughter due to divorce, separation, military service, business travel, incarceration, or similar circumstances...
Respect her opinions but keep in mind you're the adult. Too many times fathers want to be "friends" to keep their daughters from turning away from them. It isn't easy to let them know when they have stepped over a line, but when...
I saw your post about your project. Thank you! This is an awesome idea!!! I have lots to say to the men I know are good fathers, who love their children, whether they live with them full time or not. As a woman who essentially grew up without a father and who, as a teacher, has had many students with divorced parents, I have lots of suggestions...
...Challenge yourself to be a protector of every daughter. Challenge yourself to be the 'man among men' that leads your peers to the attitudes and behaviors we all know are correct. Your daughter needs men like you to support her, so be that man to the daughters of others...
I had a conversation with a wonderful friend of mine named Susan Clay. We were discussing "forgiveness" and the way that a father could ask his daughter for that gift. While I was getting caught up in the many levels of debate and self-defense that occur when we are in the wrong, her suggested comment was so simple and perfect...
My dad came back into my life when I was a mess. He pursued the relationship. I thought I had moved on. Who knows if my turn-around was partly because my father worked tirelessly to come back into my life. My marriage didn’t last but my relationship with my father is here to stay, and here are my words of advice for you…
Do the "boring" stuff.
If you get time together it’s tempting to want it to be special and fun every time, but what may matter more down the line is asking them to bring some homework, or volunteer for their extra-curricular activity.
You want time one-on-one with them, but...
Dad's I know it is tough trying to figure out the female mind. As a mom, it is hard for us too when it comes to our daughters. You are not alone. From little up to adulthood, our daughters are constantly changing and just as we get caught up to them they are on a completely new page and once again we...
Kids even as they grow, go through phases of love and hate, but if you remain that positive force, no matter what anyone throws your way over the years, in the long run, you will stand out as being the constant positive force that sooner or later, every child needs...
Do the "boring" stuff. If you get time together it’s tempting to want it to be special and fun every time, but what may matter more down the line is asking them to bring some homework, or volunteer for their extra-curricular activity...
Recently, my dad's girlfriend took his phone and sent me the most hateful messages ever pretending to be him. After doing so she deleted them from his phone. I took screen shots and sent what she had said to me. He didn't even care...
My father left when I was 10, he dropped me at a friends house and asked what I thought about my step father adopting me. I laughed thinking he was crazy... I already had a dad, why would I need to be adopted? But I soon realized that he said that because he wasn't coming back.
My advice would be to not sit back and wait. Be pro-active. You are the parent. It is your job to show how much you love and care about your daughter. Every birthday, Christmas, graduation missed - where no call, no card, she notices. Never, ever give up trying. Even if you don't get the response you want or any response at all. Never give up! ...
Hi Gordon… Thank you so much for our conversation a bit back... after my conversation with you I mentioned I would share about the feelings I struggled with having an absent Father in emotion and ability. Heartbreaking... painful… and lead me to a life that...
When it comes to fathers and daughters, YOU are the parent. It is really up to you to be the leader regardless of her actions or lack thereof. Please do not judge if what you are doing is working or not by her actions. Girls tend to “roller-coaster” emotionally, and sometimes they do not even know why...
I wish he had shown his devotion by staying with me for a whole day occasionally rather than sticking around for a few hours or not at all. But mostly, it's what I instinctively felt from him that caused me the pain. And that was this feeling that he wanted to be somewhere else or could only 'spare' a few hours...
My advice.... call every night to say goodnight, just like you were there. Leave a message if she doesn’t pick up or text. Send text messages frequently. Ask questions about her life, have special nights where you and her only go do something special. Daddy/daughter date nights. If you are blending a family and you ask her input, take it. If you give her a choice on something in the...